Don’t Blame Others, Blame Yourself

We live in a world where insecurities get the best of us and because of this, we tend to develop negative habits to help us cope with the stresses of everyday life. We’re all addicted to something in one way or another. For some it’s music, for others it’s fitness and for many…it’s hurting themselves.

People love excuses. It seems as though they need to put the blame on someone or something else. It’s never their fault. If someone says that they can’t control themselves, they’re full of shit. We’re all in control of our own actions.

Bad behavior is bad behavior. There’s no way around it. You have to learn to break your bad habits and the first step is acknowledging you have a problem. You’re in control. No one else. It’s up to you to better yourself.

So why are so many people drawn to drugs? What’s the appeal?

It’s an escape. They take drugs to get away. They need to feel something to bury their loneliness and unhappiness. Drug abuse doesn’t get rid of anyone’s problems, it temporarily slides them under the rug. Drugs may numb the pain, but they don’t stop the hurting.

In relation to substance abuse, over-drinking and giving yourself hangovers once or several times a week is no way to live either. The ones who abuse alcohol are the ones who give drinking a bad name. You just have to realize when enough is enough. Too many don’t.

Drug and alcohol abuse aside, there are seemingly harmless vices that one may become addicted to as well. Addiction is a battle of the mind. A tug of war between a person’s conscience and their weaknesses.

While some people are reckless with their health, others are with their money. Gambling is probably the most dangerous and foolish of all addictions. There are no rewards from gambling. You can kid yourself as much as you’d like, but there isn’t anything positive about it.

Compulsive gamblers are thrill seekers who literally throw their money away. Sure you may be having fun from the games you play, but is losing more money than you’ll ever win really much fun to begin with?

People who constantly gamble do so because they believe they’re just one more game away from winning the big one. Guess what? You aren’t. All you’re doing is losing…big time.

I actually win the lottery every day. You know how? By not playing. Every dollar I would have potentially spent is instead put aside for the future for the things that actually matter to me.

On the topic of money-spending addictions, big spending and living paycheck to paycheck is another terrible habit many get themselves into.

Unlike gambling, you do get something from shopping. It’s a seemingly harmless activity, but it’s probably one of the most common and dangerous addictions of them all. Spending frivolously is easy to do. People love throwing their money away.

Just think about it. You go to the mall, there’s always some kind of promotion and you end up buying something that looks enticing thinking you’ll actually make some use from it. Months later it’s just lying around the house along with all the other crap you compulsively bought and you’re thinking about the car or house you can’t afford. Now imagine if you never bought those things to begin with and saved up instead.

I’m not telling you not to spend your money. I’m saying to set a budget and spend your money wisely. We want things so badly, that the second we have just enough money to purchase what we want, we do. All I’m saying is patience is a virtue. Be patient.

What’s just as bad as wasting money? Wasting time.

For the sake of immediate pleasure, people lose countless hours due to porn and sex addictions. It’s a time consuming illness. Hey, do your business when you have to do your business, but the expression “stop f’ing around” isn’t said for nothing. It’s a waste of time.

These addictions might not seem so bad, but they come at a cost: the loss of time and money.

Ever notice that the ones who are most successful are clear-headed and focused? They know exactly what they want and work hard to get it.

Set standards and limits for yourself. Recognize when enough is enough. Learn to say no. Especially when it comes to the things and people you know are bad for you.

Listen, I do believe that everyone has the right to live their lives how they choose so long as they aren’t hurting anybody else. That being said, you should only be doing things you truly want to. Not because the people around you do it.

The way to get yourself out of addiction is to create a productive routine that inspires you. Give yourself something worth living for. Keep yourself busy with things that help you grow as a person.

Don’t be afraid to create. Pick up an instrument, write, sculpt, play sports, do some gardening, get into fitness, grab a camera and photograph the world. There’s a million things to do…you name it. Get into the habit of being productive.

The key is being positive. Get yourself into a better mindset and environment. Stop hanging around with people who make you do things that are out of your character. If you let them influence you, that’s on you. You need to let these people go. Sticking around them will do you no good.

Doing things that are positive is a good thing. But just like addictions, an excess of anything isn’t healthy for anyone. You can’t over-do things. If you do, you’ll eventually burn yourself out. Put the brakes on every once in awhile. It’s okay to live a little every now and then. Just be responsible.

Yes, you have one life to life and you should enjoy it as you see fit. However, just because you should make the most out of each day, doesn’t mean today’s the last day you have left to live. Don’t be afraid to plan and think about your future. The sacrifices you make today will only benefit you tomorrow. Who knows, maybe they’ll all be worth it?

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Author: Robby J. Fonts

Editor-in-Chief at The RANTidote

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